zorin industries

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News

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Zorin Industries Associate Company Offers

Zorin Industries is delighted to have joined forces with two leading financial services providers that offer the very best investment opportunities for our clients.


NB Printed material is available for the hard of hearing and those who feel that the speakers in these messages are slurring uncontrollably.

STOP PRESS - Investors seeking a greater rate of return than 3.7% can apply for Zorin Industries Silicun Flud scheme. Just a small initial down payment followed by a minimal ongoing annuity secures your part in an investment that is simply dynamite.

Inquiries to .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address).

*** As with all investments please note your body can go down very fast as well as up***

Posted by News on 12/15 at 11:19 AM
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Wednesday, October 07, 2009

128-B

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Posted by PMS Team on 10/07 at 03:17 PM
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Tuesday, October 06, 2009

Zorin Industries to rigorously defend FT allegations

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London, UK

Zorin Industries today launched legal proceedings against the London Financial Times.  The action follows a recent story published by the paper entitled ‘Zorin’s Nazi Past’ by so called ‘journalist’ James Stock.

Mr Zorin denies, in the strongest terms, all the allegations set forth in the report.  In particular, the assertion that Mr Zorin’s birth was the result of some sort of evil Nazi genetics experiment gone wrong has absolutely no basis in fact.  As is it universally known, Mr Zorin is a leading French industrialist, and it would be impossible for him, or any of his staff, to have any connection to the use of steroids on pregnant women in Nazi concentration camps.  It’s absurd.  That kind of thing, while likely producing children with phenomenal IQs, would lead to psychotic side effects, which is clearly not something that a man like Mr Zorin could ever be accused of.

The Financial Times could not be reached for comment, as we could not find their phone number.

Posted by News on 10/06 at 10:34 PM
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Friday, September 25, 2009

Wanted - Part II

In a recent news item (Wanted), we appealed for information regarding the real identity of an intruder at Mr Zorin’s stables.  Despite several good leads, we have not yet been able to name the man, who was posing as a horse trainer named ‘James St. John Smythe’.  Today we can release CCTV footage from the break-in.  We ask that you watch the video in the hope that it triggers a memory or encourages other victims to come forward.  Please remember - we believe this man is highly dangerous who is, amongst other things, a master of the double entendre.

Many thanks again

M. Scarpine
Head of Security

Posted by News on 09/25 at 09:15 AM
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Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Clarification

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Mr Zorin would like it to be known that he knew, all along, that he was not in fact purchasing the master recordings to the Beatles back catalogue, but was buying a CD box set of re-mastered recordings.  He would also like to make clear that he did not mistake the company HMV as an exclusive dealer of master recordings but that he knew all the time that they were a high street record store.  Additionally, Mr Zorin denies that at any stage did he threaten anyone at HMV with death if they would not refund the purchase.  Furthermore, Mr Zorin would like to make it known that his favorite Beatle is Ringo, and his favorite song is Octopuss’s Garden.

Posted by News on 09/22 at 04:32 PM
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