zorin industries

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Tuesday, October 06, 2009

Zorin Industries to rigorously defend FT allegations

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London, UK

Zorin Industries today launched legal proceedings against the London Financial Times.  The action follows a recent story published by the paper entitled ‘Zorin’s Nazi Past’ by so called ‘journalist’ James Stock.

Mr Zorin denies, in the strongest terms, all the allegations set forth in the report.  In particular, the assertion that Mr Zorin’s birth was the result of some sort of evil Nazi genetics experiment gone wrong has absolutely no basis in fact.  As is it universally known, Mr Zorin is a leading French industrialist, and it would be impossible for him, or any of his staff, to have any connection to the use of steroids on pregnant women in Nazi concentration camps.  It’s absurd.  That kind of thing, while likely producing children with phenomenal IQs, would lead to psychotic side effects, which is clearly not something that a man like Mr Zorin could ever be accused of.

The Financial Times could not be reached for comment, as we could not find their phone number.

Posted by News on 10/06 at 10:34 PM
News • (12) Comments • Permalink

Friday, September 25, 2009

Wanted - Part II

In a recent news item (Wanted), we appealed for information regarding the real identity of an intruder at Mr Zorin’s stables.  Despite several good leads, we have not yet been able to name the man, who was posing as a horse trainer named ‘James St. John Smythe’.  Today we can release CCTV footage from the break-in.  We ask that you watch the video in the hope that it triggers a memory or encourages other victims to come forward.  Please remember - we believe this man is highly dangerous who is, amongst other things, a master of the double entendre.

Many thanks again

M. Scarpine
Head of Security

Posted by News on 09/25 at 09:15 AM
News • (11) Comments • Permalink

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Classified - For Sale

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Renault Fuego Turbo


Red, 2,000km with full service history, velour upholstery, auto-reverse cassette desk.
Former company vehicle, one lady driver, only used on short trips.
Never chopped in half or pushed into a lake.


Bargain at €3,000.  Will consider all serious offers.


Inquiries to .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address).


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Posted by Jenny Flex on 09/24 at 08:01 AM
Personnel • (7) Comments • Permalink

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Employee Profile - May Day

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May joined Zorin Industries from IBM where she held the post of HR Manager for 3 years. During this time she played a key role in reducing headcount by 36% through a proactive mix of voluntary termination and a deskilling process now commonly referred to in the HR industry as ‘the car wash’.


May then chose to look for a new role involving regular travel and a more hands on approach to supporting the company strategy. Zorin Industries’ international business activities, along with charismatic chairman Max Zorin’s keen interest in horse racing, have proven to be the ideal challenge for May. It was Max Zorin himself who suggested that May would have a natural connection with his stallions when he first saw her bending over during a judo training session. He was right and May brings to Zorin Industries a broad range of skills in both people and horse management.


Outside the world of work May enjoys parachuting, lifting things, wrestling and listening to pop music where she considers herself to be something of a slave to the rythym. She is currently single but is looking for the right man to take care of her personally, however orange or bumbling he may be.

Posted by News on 09/23 at 03:49 PM
Personnel • (8) Comments • Permalink

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Clarification

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Mr Zorin would like it to be known that he knew, all along, that he was not in fact purchasing the master recordings to the Beatles back catalogue, but was buying a CD box set of re-mastered recordings.  He would also like to make clear that he did not mistake the company HMV as an exclusive dealer of master recordings but that he knew all the time that they were a high street record store.  Additionally, Mr Zorin denies that at any stage did he threaten anyone at HMV with death if they would not refund the purchase.  Furthermore, Mr Zorin would like to make it known that his favorite Beatle is Ringo, and his favorite song is Octopuss’s Garden.

Posted by News on 09/22 at 04:32 PM
News • (9) Comments • Permalink
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