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Friday, June 25, 2010

Zorin disowns French Football team

Leading French Industrialist ‘fires’ entire squad and distances himself from failed bid to salvage World Cup campaign

Knysna, South Africa

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Despite encouraging his team to improvise on the field and to play with fear, the French football team have crashed out of the World Cup in complete failure.  Following the final group game against South Africa, which France lost 2-1, Mr Zorin squarely blamed the players for the failure.  “Look at them!  They are fools.  Even the USA, a country who do not even play football, have qualified for the last 16.  This is a national disgrace, and one that soils the good name of Zorin.  For this the players will pay - with their lives!”

It is thought that the squad have already been herded into a local silver mine in preparation for the final solution.

Posted by Max Zorin on 06/25 at 03:37 PM
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Thursday, June 17, 2010

Zorin assumes control of French national football team

Leading French Industrialist replaces beleaguered Raymond Domenech in bid to salvage World Cup campaign

Knysna, South Africa

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Max Zorin has arrived at the French training camp in Knysna, South Africa, to assume control of the failing football side ahead of their second group game tonight.  Mr Zorin said he felt ‘compelled to act sooner rather than later’ and that there was ‘no bad feeling’ between himself and Raymond Domenech. Mr Zorin said “He (Domenech) is not upset.  He has decided to drop out and I respect his decision.  As I speak, he is returning to France aboard my private airship.”

When questioned about his plans to revitalise his team, Mr Zorin’s answer was simple.  “More. More power. More. Do it!”

Mr Zorin has long been a vocal critic of Mr Domenech.  In a recent phone call between the two men, on the subject of the French Football authorities reluctance to sack Mr Domenech, Mr Zorin was heard to say “If you’re the best they’ve got, they’re more likely try and cover up your embarrassing incompetence.”

Posted by Max Zorin on 06/17 at 12:52 PM
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