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Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Kim Jong-il ‘Extremely satisfied’ with Zorin Industries device

The leader of the North Korean Workers’ Party™ delivers his personal thanks to Max Zorin following the successful test of a Zorin Industries designed and supplied ‘Nuclear Device’

Pyongyang, North Korea

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In a phone call earlier today, Kim Jong-il, leader of the North Korean Workers’ Party™, delivered his personal thanks to the CEO of Zorin Industries, Mr Max Zorin, following the successful test of a ‘Nuclear Device’ designed and supplied by Zorin Industries.  The device, which had the power equivalent to approx 17 ‘John McClane’s’, was detonated in an abandoned mine beneath a lake 230 miles north east of Pyongyang at a depth of just over six miles.

Pyongyang’s official Korean Central News Agency released the following statement

“The Democratic People’s Republic of Korea successfully conducted one more underground nuclear test on May 25 as part of the measures to bolster up its nuclear deterrent for self-defence in every way as requested by its scientists and technicians.

“The current nuclear test was safely conducted on a new higher level in terms of its explosive power and technology of its control and the results of the test helped satisfactorily settle the scientific and technological problems arising in further increasing the power of nuclear weapons and steadily developing nuclear technology.

“The successful nuclear test is greatly inspiring the army and people of the DPRK all out in the 150-day campaign, intensifying the drive for effecting a new revolutionary surge to open the gate to a thriving nation.

“The test will contribute to defending the sovereignty of the country and the nation and socialism and ensuring peace and security on the Korean Peninsula and the region around it with the might of Songun.”

A spokesperson for Zorin Industries said “Kick Ass!  That thing was almighty!  It caused a freaking earthquake man!  Those stupid Koreans.  They think they’re getting the bomb - all we’re doing is prepping for main strike!  Dumb ass mofos!”

Posted by News on 05/27 at 08:58 AM
News • Worldwide • (2) Comments • Permalink
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